May 14, 2014
As I enter into the reaping room, I freeze in my tracks. This is the entire pool of tributes to choose from? I think as I take my seat. This year, there are hardly any eligible tributes in the reaping ball. The odds really aren’t in my favor this year! A nervous sweat trickles slowly down my forehead. NO! Not here, I tell myself, if I do end up in the games I will need allies, and in order to do that I can’t appear weak. I sit there among the other fifteen year olds and try my very best to seem indifferent. For me, pulling off a poker face is harder than a crystal, but I somehow manage.
Harper Haze walks up to the stage, wearing her usual flats and blue glasses. She digs around in the reaping ball and time seems to slow down. I constantly have to wipe my sweaty palms on my new skirt and I can feel my heart racing a thousand beats a second. Harper takes out a piece of paper and we all watch her saunter over to the microphone. As she takes it in her hands I pray to God do not let it be me. I will do anything but don’t let her say my name. She then clears her throat with a quick cough and announces the last thing I want to hear: “Catherine Grace”. Just like that, the very small flicker of hope still in me completely goes out.
I walk up to the stage and I look over at my mom, dad, and my younger siblings (Allison and Patrick). I see them crying and it was like you could hear my heart shatter into a million pieces. The realization that this will probably be the last time I ever see them hits me in full force right then and there and I blink back the hot tears that I can feel forming in my eyes. You have to be strong, I say to myself, for them. My mom and I look straight into each other’s eyes and there is a tacit understanding between us that this is most likely good-bye, forever.
Wow! This was a great essay!! You went into great detail about how you were feeling and the thoughts that were going through you head! I love the line where you said, “The realization that this will probably be the last time I ever see them hits me in full force right then and there and I blink back the hot tears that I can feel forming in my eyes.” This was a very emotional and it made me feel what you were feeling. There were very few mistakes in this essay and I enjoyed reading it! GOOD WORK!
I thought this was very well written i liked you r opening and your spin on the hunger games with your sensory details. I feel you could have used a little more sensory detail here and there but overall it was well written.
I thought that this post was very well written.It really made you feel what you were going through. If I were to add something to make it better than it already is I would add something about how people around you looked, and the others from you districts reactions.
The thoughts of the character were very clear to the reader and well written. The setting could have been laid out better with a lot more sensory details, such as describing the stage or the air in the room. The figurative language was great. There also could have been more build up to the picking of the tribute, otherwise well written.